Afraid - Faith - Excitement

I can't help but be excited that Heather has made it to South Asia. When I think about all that will take place, I know that this time is going to be wonderful. I am not so naive as to ignore the times when I am still a little sad. However, I try not to let my flesh do all the talking.

I found that there exists an ample amount of fear in Heather going overseas. This is not a surprise - but is also not welcomed to my "I'm a big girl, I can handle it" worldview.  But what was shocking came in my thought process when I chose to dwell in that fear. I realized that I approached the situation, when in fear, as if Heather were dying.(I know - morbid.) I would cry and tell Heather, "I don't want this to be over." My fear had convinced me that this was a finalization, a termination of a friendship. So convinced was I, I was morning her move as if she would not exist anymore. 

Heather and I are reading through the book of Mark. I love pacing through Scripture with her. God has spoken to my heart so much through the book of Mark.  To my fear He says, "Why are you afraid? Have you still no faith?" Faith....faith. To my entire being He tells the story of the Rich Young Ruler. The Holy Spirit reminds me that it's not in what we have and can do; but, in the things that we can't.  I can no more orchestrate my life and sustain myself that the Rich Young Ruler could sell all his possessions and give to the poor. It's not in what we can but in what we can't.  Maybe we shouldn't be so hard on the young ruler.  After all, aren't we all unable to jump some hurdle or another?

Who knows what lies ahead? Many hurdles are to come.  Some hurdles may be insurmountable.  But we cannot be afraid.  Because what is impossible needs only to be submitted to the Master's hands.  He is faithful by His very nature.  It is in our obedience, not our defiance, that we come to know His patient anger, steadfast love and redeeming plan. 

Sarah.